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My mom had gone out for work. I was curled up onthe sofa, lazily browsing through the TV channels. I was wearing a round neck,sleeveless, white t shir... and a tight denim shorts. I was also having my smallear rings, a thin waist chain and a pair of anklets on me.I stared at the TV, switching the channelsone by one. Suddenly I remembered the CD Renu had given at the last day atschool. Renu was my classmate and my best friend. She had said that the CD waspretty exciting and was a must watch. It. But once I’d decided that the dream was nature’s way of telling me I needed a boyfriend, I thought, ‘Why not?’ and I agreed to join them on the Friday night. ‘Things weren’t too bad when I was in the office because although I kept thinking about you it just spurred me on to keep working on the report. ‘He’s relying on me,’ I told myself. I kept drifting off into little fantasies about what you’d say when you got back to the office — would you give me a thank-you peck on the cheek? — and I tried. "Suddenly realising that my little sister was growing up fast, I asked nervously, "What are you trying to tell me, Sally?"Looking directly at me, she smiled as she said, "I'm lonely, Tony, lonely and frustrated, and even though I masturbate fairly regularly, it's just not the same while I know you spend a lot of time with your hand inside some girl's knickers."Taken aback somewhat, I gasped, "And how the hell do you know that?"Grinning mischievously, Sally said simply, "Girls at school talk,. ( This one actually makes sense ... well, sort of... )An Italian tourist asks a blond man: “Why do Scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?”To which the blond man replies: “If they fell forward, they’d still be in the boat.”A guy is walking along Whyte Avenue when he comes across a lamp partially buried in a garbage can.He picks up the lamp and gives it a rub.A genie appears and tells him he has been granted one wish.The guy thinks for a moment and says, “I want to live.
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